First, we embarked a 10-hour-long FlixBus towards the Milano Malpensa airport. We met two travellers from the US who thought their nationality was evident just from the way they held their pizza.

This transportation included a transfer at the bus station which promised a consistent hour, but we almost missed the second bus due to missmatch in the hours in the app and infographic tables at the station. Also, toilets are a scam. (They take your money but you cannot take a shit!)

Upon arrival at the MPX airport terminal, we tried to do late-night check-in (or, better translated, evening-before baggage drop-off). However, the MPX airport was unable to provide this service. So our plan to sleep on soft sofas in Terminal 1 changed to breaking our backs on hard concrete floor. Until 4 am.

As a warm-up, we flew for an hour to Frankfurt with plenty of layover time. Thanks to the CT-scanning technology, we were allowed to bring unlimited water.

In Frankfurt, we thought we would treat ourselves with a nice warm meal after a day of eating dry sandwiches. What a fool! Our plan was simple: just find a McDonald's. Every airport has at least one, right? Well yes but actually no. Turns out you have to be an American or a security guard with access to everything. We tried real hard but ended up sucking a weiner.

But the fun has just begun! This was our first intercontinential flight without a jet bridge. We were trolled ... with a trolley bus. Upon arrival, we had to stay inside for half an hour due to catering problems. Rumor has it McDonald's prepared McNugget's for each passanger, but the crew wasn't allowed to the zone Z to pick them up, either. With a slight delay, we rode the sky. It was quite a pleasant flight.

Welcome the Bogotá! Although we were just transferring there, we were security-scanned. There was old technology still in use, so no water allowed. However, it just magically happened that we smuggled a bottle full of water! Gotcha! We will try again when leaving. Nevetheless, the water in Bogotá is said to be safe to drink, only it tastes like a swimming pool.

We were boarded really early, then had to be slowly cooked in the jet bridge. We almost fainted when we finally entered the plane. As we had no neighbours, we were able to stretch our legs. And afford a good-night's sleep!

Due to late-night arrival, we had pre-booked a private shuttle transfer to our accomomodation. Important information: our booking was confirmed! Yay 🙌 ... or nay 🙄? Because on our arrival, there was no driver holding our name as promised. So we waited a bit longer. Half an hour, an hour ... We tried to contact the host who was later found to be travelling another country and lost internet connectivity.

After two hours, we finally managed to establish contact with Moses to get no additional information. (We suppose Moses was too busy splitting water.) Luckily, another host (Johny, la gente está muy loca ...) woke up and promised us to let us in at 4 am. Therefore, we took a taxi and were delivered at our destination.

Two showers later and we were asleep like babies.